Two of the four grandmas are here this weekend to meet Miles so I'm taking advantage of the extra help and am finally doing a post. Amazed, aren't you? Fair warning, this could potentially be a long post, but there will be pictures at the end!
We were "approved" to adopt last November. This essentially means that we passed our home study, background checks, etc. So, our wait began. Over the course of the next nine months we were contacted about 12 babies that were available for adoption. In almost every situation our caseworker called to see if we wanted our profile to be shown to these birth moms, but then we never heard another word so we assumed she had chosen someone else. We got a little bit farther in the process in a couple of situations, but ultimately it didn't work out.
We had a very quiet summer with absolutely no calls regarding adoption and I started to get frustrated. At the beginning of August while Dave was in Alaska visiting his brother I spent an entire Friday evening on the computer researching ways that would help us spread the word that we wanted to adopt. The very next morning I woke up to a VERY exciting email waiting in my inbox. An adoption agency in Orem had found our profile on Parent Profiles and was in need of a couple for a baby on an urgent basis. I immediately called the contact person for this agency and gathered more information. I then called Dave to see if this was something he was interested in pursuing and he agreed. This is what started it all and began the emotional roller coaster we were on for the next month. In the end this particular birth mom did not pick us, but it wasn't long before Miles joined our family.
Not even a week later we got another call from this agency saying that a birth mother had picked us. We couldn't be more excited!!! This baby was due at the end of Sept. so we had about a month to prepare for the arrival. Over the course of the next few days we started to not feel so good about this situation and were wondering if maybe we should not pursue it. There was a miscommunication between us and the agency and this situation was going to cost us quite a bit more than what we were comfortable with. After many prayers were said and several tears were shed we decided that we needed to back out. This had to be one of the hardest things we have done up to this point.
The tears hadn't even dried when I decided to check my email again. Waiting in my inbox was another exciting email. I thought for sure that this was an answer to our prayers and the reason that the last situation didn't feel right. This email was from an adoption agency located in Layton. They had a baby that was born that exact morning and was located in Michigan. They wanted to know if we were interested and if we were able to fly out to Michigan immediately. We talked it over quickly and decided that we would do whatever it took to get this baby. Everything changed in the next 24 hours or so though and the mom started having doubts about her decision to place. We patiently waited for her to make her decision before we flew out there. About three or four days later we received word that the birth mom was being discharged from the hospital and was going to keep the baby. Up to that point that was the farthest we had made it in the process so when we received word she was keeping the baby we just broke down emotionally. I pretty much cried that entire weekend and wondered, "why me/us?"
The next couple of weeks were very quiet, but I think it gave us time to heal and prepare for the next roller coaster ride. Late one Thursday night (11:30 p.m.) we got a call from the agency in Layton. They had a birth mom who had delivered a week previous in Colorado. They bought her a train ticket to Utah and were wondering if we would be interested in this baby. We were reluctant, but of course agreed. When the day arrived for the birth mom to arrive in Utah she never got off the train and they never heard a word from her again. Once again, this was very hard on us, but each step helped us get a little bit more prepared. This birth mom was to arrive in Utah on a Friday evening and by Monday morning we received another call from the agency in Layton.
The day was Sept. 14th. They had a birth mom in North Carolina who had delivered a baby boy that morning. By this point we were VERY hesitant and reserved. We, of course, wanted to pursue the situation, but also wanted to be reserved in order to protect ourselves. I told the caseworker that we really did not want to fly out to NC until we had almost 100% confirmation that this birth mom was going to place. They seemed to be under the impression that this was the case and that the birth mom was positive she couldn't raise her baby. The agency here hired an attorney in NC to begin all of the legal paperwork while we looked for flights out there. Late in the afternoon I received a call from the attorney and he recommended that we not hop on any plane too quickly because he didn't think the birth mom was 100% sure. He said we should give her a day to make a decision. The next day seemed to bring better news. Everyone was under the impression that she was going to go through with the adoption, but that she was very interested in meeting us first. We booked a flight for that evening and arrived in NC bright and early the next day.
We got off the plane and hit the ground running...
(more to come)
We were "approved" to adopt last November. This essentially means that we passed our home study, background checks, etc. So, our wait began. Over the course of the next nine months we were contacted about 12 babies that were available for adoption. In almost every situation our caseworker called to see if we wanted our profile to be shown to these birth moms, but then we never heard another word so we assumed she had chosen someone else. We got a little bit farther in the process in a couple of situations, but ultimately it didn't work out.
We had a very quiet summer with absolutely no calls regarding adoption and I started to get frustrated. At the beginning of August while Dave was in Alaska visiting his brother I spent an entire Friday evening on the computer researching ways that would help us spread the word that we wanted to adopt. The very next morning I woke up to a VERY exciting email waiting in my inbox. An adoption agency in Orem had found our profile on Parent Profiles and was in need of a couple for a baby on an urgent basis. I immediately called the contact person for this agency and gathered more information. I then called Dave to see if this was something he was interested in pursuing and he agreed. This is what started it all and began the emotional roller coaster we were on for the next month. In the end this particular birth mom did not pick us, but it wasn't long before Miles joined our family.
Not even a week later we got another call from this agency saying that a birth mother had picked us. We couldn't be more excited!!! This baby was due at the end of Sept. so we had about a month to prepare for the arrival. Over the course of the next few days we started to not feel so good about this situation and were wondering if maybe we should not pursue it. There was a miscommunication between us and the agency and this situation was going to cost us quite a bit more than what we were comfortable with. After many prayers were said and several tears were shed we decided that we needed to back out. This had to be one of the hardest things we have done up to this point.
The tears hadn't even dried when I decided to check my email again. Waiting in my inbox was another exciting email. I thought for sure that this was an answer to our prayers and the reason that the last situation didn't feel right. This email was from an adoption agency located in Layton. They had a baby that was born that exact morning and was located in Michigan. They wanted to know if we were interested and if we were able to fly out to Michigan immediately. We talked it over quickly and decided that we would do whatever it took to get this baby. Everything changed in the next 24 hours or so though and the mom started having doubts about her decision to place. We patiently waited for her to make her decision before we flew out there. About three or four days later we received word that the birth mom was being discharged from the hospital and was going to keep the baby. Up to that point that was the farthest we had made it in the process so when we received word she was keeping the baby we just broke down emotionally. I pretty much cried that entire weekend and wondered, "why me/us?"
The next couple of weeks were very quiet, but I think it gave us time to heal and prepare for the next roller coaster ride. Late one Thursday night (11:30 p.m.) we got a call from the agency in Layton. They had a birth mom who had delivered a week previous in Colorado. They bought her a train ticket to Utah and were wondering if we would be interested in this baby. We were reluctant, but of course agreed. When the day arrived for the birth mom to arrive in Utah she never got off the train and they never heard a word from her again. Once again, this was very hard on us, but each step helped us get a little bit more prepared. This birth mom was to arrive in Utah on a Friday evening and by Monday morning we received another call from the agency in Layton.
The day was Sept. 14th. They had a birth mom in North Carolina who had delivered a baby boy that morning. By this point we were VERY hesitant and reserved. We, of course, wanted to pursue the situation, but also wanted to be reserved in order to protect ourselves. I told the caseworker that we really did not want to fly out to NC until we had almost 100% confirmation that this birth mom was going to place. They seemed to be under the impression that this was the case and that the birth mom was positive she couldn't raise her baby. The agency here hired an attorney in NC to begin all of the legal paperwork while we looked for flights out there. Late in the afternoon I received a call from the attorney and he recommended that we not hop on any plane too quickly because he didn't think the birth mom was 100% sure. He said we should give her a day to make a decision. The next day seemed to bring better news. Everyone was under the impression that she was going to go through with the adoption, but that she was very interested in meeting us first. We booked a flight for that evening and arrived in NC bright and early the next day.
We got off the plane and hit the ground running...
(more to come)
3 comments:
What a story this is! I can't wait to hear the rest of the happy ending and see more pictures! I am so happy for you guys.
Wow, what an amazing story! Can't wait to hear the rest. So I'm wondering if you didn't end up using LDS Services? Was it a different agency that you ended up with in the end?
This post made me cry! I'm so glad this rollercoaster ended so well for you guys!<3
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