Update on the boys

We haven't done a whole lot the last two months because of one illness after another it seems. We've had it rough this winter! We're all ready to be well again, but this last round of colds seem to just hang on. We're all still congested and coughing. It's horrible.

I do have a few posts that I need to do, but decided that I'd just do another no-picture post with an update on the boys for now. Hopefully my energy will return one of these days and I can transfer the pictures from my phone to the computer!

Miles started back to his preschool at Provo High this week. They were off from early December until the end of February. It was a LONG break! Miles was so excited to go back. He has missed it dearly. His other preschool is off this week because his teacher and her family got to go to Disneyland! He is missing his friends and his teacher from that preschool now. Next week he should be a happy camper because both preschools will be up and running. He just loves playing with his friends and getting some time away from the house.

On Monday, February 23rd Miles had four of his baby teeth pulled. A couple of weeks ago Miles told me he had a sore in his mouth. I took a look at it and quickly realized he had a permanent tooth coming in. It was back behind his baby teeth on the bottom in the front. It was pushing his baby teeth apart, but they were not loose or wiggly at all. I called his dentist's office and they suggested we bring him in. On Monday the dentist pointed out that his other bottom front permanent tooth is close to coming in as well so he suggested pulling all four of the front bottom baby teeth. He said that would just help the permanent teeth come in straighter and be in the proper position. Miles hated the shots that numbed his mouth and sort of went in to freak out mode, but we made it through. Once he was numb he was a trooper with the extractions. The dentist said he'd be sore for a couple of days, but he hasn't complained of any pain. I gave him some ibuprofen the first day and that has been all he has needed. We weren't really prepared to be tooth fairies yet (I wasn't expecting his teeth to fall out for quite some time yet). I tried to make a cute a little box for him to put his teeth in, but I wasn't able to pull it off before he went to bed. We decided to just go low-key and worry about a cute box for the next time. The tooth fairy brought him $1 for each of his teeth (we weren't sure what the going rate was these days and decided $1/tooth sounded reasonable). Although he told me he wanted the tooth fairy to bring him a car instead of money, he was super excited the next morning to see his $4. He now wants to go spend it on a car!

After several years of worrying about Miles and having lots of struggles with him, we decided last fall to start looking in to what was going on with him. Through my job at the United Way I was able to connect with the BYU Comprehensive Clinic to get him tested. The wait-list is usually a year long, but because of my connections we only had to wait a couple of months. We spent the entire fall attending different meetings with a student in the psychiatry department at BYU, filling out questionnaires, having his preschool teacher fill out questionnaires, etc. We got a diagnosis sometime around the beginning of December of ADHD - combined type. This means that he has both the hyperactivity and the inattentiveness. BYU recommended that we start "therapy" and then determine later if we feel like medication is needed. Because Miles isn't old enough to go through the "therapy" himself, they recommended that Dave and I attending weekly "therapy" sessions to learn how to be better parents and how to help Miles. It isn't "therapy" as much as it is education. We're supposed to go weekly for classes, but because of all of our illnesses we've missed several weeks. We're on like step 4 of what I believe is an 11 step process or something like that. The classes have been really helpful. We're all still learning, but I think it helps to have some tools on how to handle him when times get tough. We're trying to focus more on the positive things he does and catch him making good choices. That isn't always easy to do especially when we're used to reacting to his "bad" behavior. Through this process I've also connected with a local support group and have attended one meeting. It was all about medication for ADHD. I learned a lot and had confirmation that we are on the right path; that psychotherapy is best first and then decide if medication can add to the psychotherapy. It's nice to have resources and to not feel alone! I'm glad we're getting this all figured out before he starts kindergarten next fall as well. Hopefully he won't have struggles in school and school will overall be a positive experience for him!

Now on to Oliver...

Oliver decided about a week before he turned 14 months old (the end of January) that he was ready to start walking. He is a pretty cautious guy (unless he's climbing something) so he'd only take a few steps at first, but he is pretty much walking all over the place these days. He will occasionally crawl still, but it's not very often. His little elephant that Grandma gave him doesn't get much attention these days as he no longer needs it to get where he's going.

He hasn't really been interested in saying actual words until recently. He will say "mama" and "more" but that's about it. Sometimes I think he is saying "ball" when he sees a ball, but I'm not quite sure if he is really meaning that. He will throw his hands up in the air when he's "all done" and sometimes it sounds like he is saying "done." If he's acting tired and you ask him if he's ready for a nap, he'll walk over to the bottom of the stairs and point up towards his bedroom. He doesn't protest naps much. He's getting to where he won't always take a second nap during the day. He'll just hang out in his crib jibber jabbering and playing away. We'll probably have to start transitioning him to one nap in the next while.

He hasn't grown much in the last 6 months. He went through a big growth spurt between 9 mos. and 1 year and since then has leveled off. He had his 15 month doctor's appointment today and the doctor isn't worried about him because he's still a big boy. Today he weighed 25.88 lbs (88th percentile), he is 32 inches long (80th percentile), and his head circumference is 18.5 inches (56th percentile). So, he isn't almost off the charts anymore, but he's still big.

There are only two things that really frustrate him; not getting food fast enough and his big brother blocking him from doing what he wants to do. Other than that he is a pretty easy going little guy. He isn't a fan of pain or being sick though so he does get cranky when he's getting new teeth (he now has a total of 11 teeth - 3 of them are molars) or when he can't breathe at night. With these colds he's had a couple of ear infections this winter and those are pretty rough for him.

He still isn't a fan of his car seat. We've even gone against the "recommendations" and have turned his seat around (we should've waited until he was 2). He just hates to be strapped in. I think he does a bit better facing forward but not as much as I would've hoped. We are hoping to go to Kansas in April for spring break and are trying to work up the courage to spend 15+ hours in the car with him. I want to see friends and family badly, but man the trip is going to be rough! I hope I'm wrong!

That's about all I can think of on the boys right now. Stayed tuned for pictures of the few fun things we've done over the last couple of months.

There's a first time for everything - part 2

I've been down this road once already back in April, but when my boss called me first thing Monday morning (1/12/15) and laid me off, I was completely devastated...again! I had no clue it was coming and could hardly believe what she was telling me. My exact words to her were "this makes me SO sad!" I really loved my job and loved the flexibility of it.

Back in August I had a heart to heart with my boss. I basically told her that I was going to have to quit (after only working there for a month) because I couldn't find affordable childcare for the boys. It was just a part-time job and I wasn't making a ton of money (that happens in the nonprofit world). All of the childcare options we found that were suitable were fairly far away from our house and also would take up almost half of what I was making each hour. We decided that it just wasn't worth it.

My boss informed me that she didn't want to see me go, she really valued me. She came up with the solution that I would job share with one of the other candidates they interviewed for my position. They really liked her, but she didn't offer the long-term stability or experience that I offered, therefore I got the position. This other candidate was going to do my in-office hours (about 15 hours a week) and I was going to do 8 hours a week from home with 2 hours on Wednesdays in the office for team meetings. A neighbor of ours had offered to watch the boys for those two hours each week so it was perfect.

My boss did inform me that we would try things out until December and then reevaluate. Well, December came and went and she never said a word to me so I figured all was well. She never led on that she was struggling trying to manage two of us, etc.

The reason for letting me go that she gave me was because it was too confusing to have two administrative assistants and that those we worked with (other staff and volunteers) were confused and never knew who to talk to.

At the time I didn't say much because I was in shock. After everything had time to sink in, I started having feelings of frustration and confusion. I debated whether or not I should speak with her one last time to get my questions answered. I ultimately decided to have a conversation with her because later in the day on Monday my boss's boss emailed me with a job offer. I knew that I couldn't even begin to think about this new job offer with all of those emotions building up inside.

We chatted on Friday and I was able to ask her the questions I wanted answered. We had a fairly close relationship so I was hurt that she didn't come to me in December to tell me that it wasn't working for her. I voiced to her that I would've appreciated her coming to me and saying this is what I need from you (X amount of hours in the office, etc.) and if you can't do this, then we need to let you go and give your hours to the other AA. Miles starts kindergarten next year and Dave is off for the summer beginning in four months. Had I been given an ultimatum, I might have decided that for four months it would be worth it to put the boys in childcare in order to keep my job. I LOVED this position, loved my boss, loved being in the nonprofit world again, loved that it was part-time, loved that the working hours were fairly flexible, etc. etc. I would have tried my hardest to make it work!

She agreed with me and told me that she was sorry. She told me that she looked for a brand new AA for four weeks to replace both myself and the other AA so she'd have one person who could do exactly what she needed (because the other AA has some limits as well since she works another part-time job that she won't give up). She couldn't find that perfect person so she decided to let me go and stick with the AA who was already working in the office.

The other AA is fresh out of college and has a husband who is applying to law school all over the country so her future with United Way is definitely unknown. My boss mentioned to me that if this AA leaves, I will be the first person she calls.

It has definitely been an emotional roller-coaster ride for me the last couple of weeks. The other position that I've been offered is a full-time administrative assistant position for my boss's boss. One of the girls that I worked closely with last summer and who I was hired to be a backup for is leaving at the end of April. Since I already know a lot of her job and since they seem to like me there, they have offered her job to me. They are going to change the position a little bit in the process. They would like for me to start on April 20th and have offered $1 more per hour in wages. The job is tempting, but I HATE that it is full-time! I haven't felt rushed to make a decision since April is still a ways off, so the debate continues.

Mid-April is a bad time for Miles to be switching from his current preschools to a daycare setting and so I've asked my mom if she would be willing/able to come stay with us for 1-1/2 months to finish out Miles' year at preschool if I decide to take the job. That way he could finish what he started and really not have any interruption to his life if his mom goes to work full-time. Being the wonderful mother that she is, she has agreed to help. Then, Dave would be home with the boys all summer which would give us time to figure out what to do in the fall when Miles starts kindergarten.

In the meantime, my boss's boss has given me some contract work. He has three projects that he would like help with and has hired me to do these projects. One of them is due on 2/12 and the others he would like done by the end of Feb. I just feel so blessed that they value me enough to offer opportunities like this to me. All of this can be done from home as well!

And...one last comment about the job offer...midweek last week the job went from a 40 hour/week position to a 35 hour/week position with it increasing to 40 hours/week during the busy time of the year which is mainly the fall. He also thought maybe those extra 5 hours could be done from home! It feels good to be valued so much that he's willing to be a little flexible with me. We'll see what we come up with as a decision.

Beautiful flowers from my hubby to help lift my spirits

Oliver's first "official" hair cut

After Oliver and I dropped Miles off at preschool on Tuesday, Jan. 6th, we headed to Lehi for Oliver's first official haircut. 

We've driven by a store called "Cookie Cutters" many times over the years. Being the dessert lover that I am, I thought it was a dessert store until I looked it up online. It's actually a hair salon for kids! Their website made it look like a really fun place so I thought I'd give it a try with our busy 1-year-old. The video on their website made it look like Oliver would get a certificate for his first haircut with a clipping of his hair.

He didn't get a certificate, but she did save a clipping of his hair and was super patient the entire time. He's got the cutest curls in the back and I'm not ready to cut those off, but I wanted his hair trimmed up around his ears and his eyes. She did exactly what I asked with a very wiggly little boy! He'd turn his head to look at every. single. sound. She definitely earned her pay.

He got to sit in an airplane & watch a movie & then got a sucker & a balloon at the end

The curls in the back

Trimmed up around his ears & eyes

After seeing the pictures and hearing the stories, Miles wants to get his hair cut there too!

Christmas Vacation

Since it snowed all day on Christmas Day, the day after Christmas proved to be a perfect day for sledding! I stayed home with Oliver so he could take a nap while Dave and Miles went sledding. There is a little sledding hill at a park nearby that they went to. I think both boys had a blast. Miles keeps hoping for more snow so he can go again.

We didn't do a whole lot over the Christmas break while Dave and Miles were off of school. It was nice to just spend time together and relax. We did manage to squeeze in one trip out of town though.

We normally don't celebrate New Year's because it's too hard for us to stay up that late and then get up early the next morning with our early birds. This year was different though. We found out a few days before New Year's that one of Dave's sisters and her family was in Utah visiting from Washington. They invited us to one of Dave's brother's houses in Logan for a New Year's Eve party. We knew we had to go!

I didn't take any pictures. I guess I was too busy chatting and chasing Oliver around a non-baby proofed house. We had a blast though. Miles loved playing with his cousins, Oliver loved exploring Uncle Dan and Aunt Tonya's big house, and Dave and I loved spending time with some of his family. It's always a good time catching up! We even made it to midnight, but got awakened at 5 a.m. by Miles. Ugh! We're getting too old for that!

In an attempt to keep Oliver happy in the car on the way up to Logan, we turned his seat around temporarily so he was forward facing. He had moments of unhappiness, but overall it wasn't nearly as bad as it has been traveling with him lately. We only stayed one night in Logan. On the way home on New Year's Day both boys fell asleep in the car. Starting the day at 5 a.m. and playing hard with cousins led to two tired boys. Oliver only slept for 29 minutes, but it was a blissful 29 minutes for Mom and Dad!

While in Logan we got a belated Christmas gift from Tonya. She's so talented! She found an old spring mattress at Dave's grandma's house (Tonya is the sentimental type) and decided to make all of the siblings wreaths out of it. Who'da thunk? It's amazing and so beautiful! I was excited to hang it up on our wall and love the way it looks.

Over the Christmas break we also decided to get Miles a new bed. When we first moved back to Provo we tried putting both boys in the same room and it didn't last long. They both kept waking each other up and no one was getting any sleep. We decided to put Miles' mattress on the floor in our room and have had it that way since August.

I was finally done with having Miles in our room and decided we should try the boys in the same room again, but maybe with a different bed for Miles this time. After searching the internet for ideas, we found a fun bed at Ikea that we thought might work. It's like a loft bed but not quite so high like most of them are. It also has a tent that can be added. We thought that would be the perfect solution so that Miles could "hide" in his bed and not be seen by Oliver.

We took Miles to Ikea to look at it and he fell in love. He was SO excited to get a new bed! He also loves the "cave" that is under his bed that he can play in.

So far things have been going pretty well. Miles is able to sneak in and out of the room when he has to go potty and it hasn't bothered Oliver too much. I'm crossing my fingers things continue to go well.

Christmas family picture

I completely forgot about this picture we took Christmas morning after all the gifts had been opened until now. It was taken with my actual camera versus my phone so I didn't see it when I did our Christmas posts. Enjoy!

Making my blog private

I'm tossing around the idea of making my blog private. I think I'm leaning towards this decision because of social media. I like being "friends" with old high school classmates, past coworkers and bosses, former neighbors, etc. on Facebook, but I'm not entirely positive I want them reading my blog. Make sense? I like the idea of my blog being available only to close friends and relatives.

I'm hoping that I've been able to delete the program that automatically posts on Facebook when I put a new post on my blog (I'll see with this post if it worked) so that will help some. Only those who care about my blog and think to check it will see when it is updated.

If I do decide to go private, I'll just need an email address from you if you'd like to have "permission" to see my blog. You'd then have to log-in using that email address to see it. I know this is sort of a hassle, but it will protect us and give us some privacy.

I haven't officially made the decision yet, but I'll let you know if/when I do!