Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Thoughts

As I sit here on the eve of Miles' adoption being final, my mind is full of thoughts and my heart is full of love! We've been told by our attorney that tomorrow we will be asked a series of 16 questions so that the Judge can get to know us better. One of those questions is one of those hard open-ended questions that I just dread answering because I have a VERY hard time putting in to words how I feel. So, I thought it might be nice to "force" myself to put a few of my thoughts on the blog so I'm a little more prepared for tomorrow morning. AND...it gives those of you who can't be there tomorrow an opportunity to know the gist of how I answered this question.

The question is: "Could you please share with the court your feelings regarding this adoption?" I know, yucky right? LOL!

The obvious answer is that Miles has been a huge blessing to our lives and to our family. Our journey through infertility was long and full of sadness, but without that we would never have Miles in our family. Every step we took to try to naturally conceive our own child got us mentally and emotionally prepared for the idea of our family growing through adoption. I never in a million years thought we wouldn't naturally conceive our own child so I really had never thought about adoption, but now that we've been through the adoption experience, I'm so thankful Heavenly Father chose this path for us.

Some people think that adopting is the "easy" way to start/grow a family, but we are witnesses to the fact that adoption isn't easy. Along the way I kept a journal of how many babies we heard about before Miles and although at this moment I can't remember the exact number, I do remember that it was some crazy number like 16. So, every time we got a call from our caseworker about a possible baby we went on an emotional roller coaster. And, if you've read Miles' adoption story then you know that our trip to North Carolina wasn't the easy trip in the world either, but we had faith and put our trust in the Lord and were able to bring home the sweetest baby boy EVER!

Miles has taught me so much about myself that I never knew before. He has taught me that it is possible to fall in love instantly and how to be a selfless person and put his needs and wants ahead of my own. Having an infant around isn't always the easiest thing, but those huge unconditional smiles and those wet slobbery kisses that he gives make all of those hard times much easier and well worth it. I am so excited for the future and to see the man that he becomes!!!

Miles is a very lucky dude! He not only has the love and support of us and our extended family, but he also has the love of his birth family...a love that is so strong that they selflessly placed him for adoption, a decision that did not come easy.

So, how do I feel about this adoption? Well, I know without a doubt that Miles is ours and that he was supposed to join our family. He has filled a void we had in our hearts and has brought us more joy than we could ever imagine. I love him so much and want only the best for him!!!

7 comments:

Jen said...

I'm so excited for you guys!! Good luck and congrats! :)

Elaine Shandra said...

Perfectly answered, even for such a tough question!

Richards Family said...

Congratulations on getting to finalize your wonderful family. As complete as you feel today at court, you will feel that much more complete when you get to go to the temple with Miles. I am so happy for your family.

Erika said...

Ahhh! What a sweet statement...not only are you fortunate to have Miles, but he is so fortunate to have you and Dave too! What wonderful parents you've made - I knew that you would! I really can't wait to meet the little guy and give you a big hug! Miss you friend!

With love,
Erika

Jen said...

It seem like I was just reading about your adventures in North Carolina. I can't believe you have had your sweet baby Miles for 6 months. Be sure to add pictures of your cute family when you guys go to the temple. CONGRATULATION!

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